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Men, Let Her Upgrade You

The church taught us traditionally that the man is the head. While my personal experience was very different growing up because I grew up in a home with my mother as a single parent and typically making decisions as the head of our household, I remained convinced that a man at the head was the correct order of things. I carried this mindset into my marriage and, in many ways, became domineering in my leading at home because I was “the head.” I can recall saying to my wife in a very heated disagreement that if she couldn’t comply with my decision that she would be rebelling against God’s order for our home and family. In replaying that moment in my mind, I can see how detrimental that mentality was for my marriage and family. During a season of my life where I was working to restore my marriage, I realized that perhaps I was wrong about my view of things. Is it possible that I was frustrated because I saw my wife as my support only? One of my mentors in a conversation challenged me to take a look at the scriptures and thoroughly study the origin of creation and God’s intent.

After a careful look at both Scripture and my life, I realized that God never intended for Eve to be the support to Adam ONLY but to be his EQUAL. Let’s take a look at what God said,

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

And God blessed THEM, and God said unto THEM, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and HAVE DOMINION (Gen 1:27-28)

When you examine the above, what you find is that God intended for Adam and Eve to be EQUAL in authority and power. It was after the fall that we find a deviation from God’s intent. Sin caused chaos in everything God established, including the purpose for the existence of the woman.

Now I know I know some of you would say well what about the Bible describing Eve as the helpmeet. If you study the meaning of helpmeet, it means face to face or a helper his opposite. In other words, Eve was equal to Adam, but she possessed different attributes.

The cultural shift we see in the role of women in business, church, government, and so many other aspects is not just a revolt against traditional views but a realignment with God’s perspective. The woman is so powerful that after her creation, our adversary Satan appears. He was in the garden but didn’t surface until the woman appeared because she possessed the missing element that Adam needed to produce what was in God’s heart, which was for them to be fruitful and multiply.

All I’m trying to say is Eve is equal in power and authority to Adam. Today, I can say that when I started viewing my wife as my equal, we were able to produce more together. She is my EQUAL, and we support each other. We found the rhythm of our partnership when I no longer saw her as my support alone but my equal. During this month, let’s not just celebrate women, but we need to realign our perspective and empower our women to take their rightful place in the world.

Nathan J. Culver

Author Nathan J. Culver

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